On Sunday I had the opportunity to attend a good friend’s wedding. It was a beautiful ceremony, outside, beneath the canopy of large trees. Warm, sunny and perfect for a cute dress, complemented by a nice pair of heels. I am a “jeans and sandal” girl, but lately I have been trying to tap into my “sexy wife” side. The problem is that as pretty as my husband says I look, I don’t practice enough to feel comfortable. I pushed my insecurities aside and went for it!
We made it all the way to the ceremony and on time:) We sat just minutes before the beautiful bride strut her stuff down the aisle. Tears filled my eyes as we clapped for the happily married newly weds! The guests began to file back out towards the parking lot to head over to the reception. I held my husbands arm as we followed the crowd. He leaned close to my ear and whispered, “Babe, you look so beautiful.” The corners of my lips turned up as my cheeks blushed cherry red, whispering back, “Thank you!” I felt so good, so beautiful, so NOT paying attention to my feet and my high quickly fell way low! I hit the edge of the grass and my ankle buckled. Landing on all fours, I tried my best to gracefully stand with a smile and a laugh at my own expense; but I didn’t want to smile or laugh, I wanted to cry. I was physically hurt, angry and embarrassed! All I could imagine was behind the momentary glances of concern from onlookers was a combustible laughter waiting to be unleashed.
My husband kept trying to make me feel better, but I wouldn’t let him. He first chuckled and said, “Beauty has a cost!” He tried to tell me that women fall all the time in heels, making my little episode “ok.” It wasn’t ok and the pain and swelling in my ankle wouldn’t let me forget that it ever happened. I may have been a little dramatic about falling, but I was most upset because it took a lot to go out of my comfort zone to feel sexier and then I fall, one of the unsexiest things I could have done. It made me want to give up trying all together.
My husband didn’t really know what else to do… he laid his hand on my knee and started to pray. All of a sudden I could feel my heart change. It softened from anger to frustration and then frustration to acceptance. It worked, because I had it in me to show up to the reception:)
Just moments after my husband prayed I had this thought regarding my shoes. It was my choice to wear the ones I wore. I learned that it takes practice and balance to walk in them. Then I thought Christians choose to follow Christ and it takes practice and balance to follow Him. We are called to apply His teachings to our life, practice His word, and balance is required in making every decision. Then I thought, I got so mad when I fell in my heels, I cared about what people thought, I was embarrassed for wearing the heels, but I didn’t take them off and I didn’t stay down. I rose up and continued to walk in the heels, even amidst the pain. Now in my Christian faith and maybe you can attest, when I am called to follow Christ’s steps and keep His commands, why don’t I get as mad or frustrated when I fall? Why don’t I care if I cause another to sin? Or care enough what people think of me when I call myself a Christian, yet I do things that are contrary to my own beliefs? If I endure pain because of the commitment I made to follow Christ, is it going to keep me down or lure me to walk a different path? I hope not! I hope that I can stand and walk, and just like I leaned on my husband for help out to the car, I know I can lean on Christ to carry me through anything!
This moment I had on Sunday, I feel like God really taught me something about my faith. Regardless of high heels or sandals, am I walking with practice and with balance? Am I willing to count the cost, not of beauty, but of Salvation and the cost of carrying my cross daily? Am I going to take my faith serious, to the point of being repulsed and angered at sin? Am I going to care about every decision I make, aware of how it effects others?
I had high heels and I had high hopes on Sunday and then I fell. It wouldn’t serve anyone any good for me to lay there in pity and as a potential stumbling block for others; I had to get up and I did. In our faith we need to remain in hope, even when we fall. We need to rise up and continue our walk with Christ, following the impressions He left for us and applying them to our lives! Being a sexy wife is important and I am positive our husbands will enjoy that, but even more importantly than walking in high heels, is walking with Jesus daily, practicing faith with balance!
