Today we interview some friends of ours who have been on a faithful journey with money and business together, Josh and Priscilla Millsap.
They have even hosted Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University groups at their home to help others join their journey! Talk about a Marriage After God…way to go guys!
Quote From Chapter 7 Of Marriage After God:
“The goal for every marriage after God is to build a healthy and biblical financial foundation so as to be good stewards and good servants with everything God entrusts to us.”
We hope this conversation about money encourages you as you pursue building up a Marriage After God, specifically in the area of finances.
Another good quote from this chapter is…
“This may seem elementary, but often the simplest things produce the most powerful impact over a lifetime, and it is those very things that often get neglected.”
Thank You for giving us the resources we need to accomplish the mission You have for us. Thank You for showing us in Your Word how to be good stewards with what we have. We pray that as Christian husbands and wives we would walk in wisdom when it comes to our finances. May we be on the same page in marriage, and may we communicate well with each other as we submit to You. We pray that we would not waste the things that You have given to us, but instead we pray we would invest them for Your kingdom. We pray that we would see everything that we have, our marriages, our children, our assets, our time, all of it, as gifts You have given us to steward well. Please help us to be an example in this world of how to live righteously. Help us to be an example to our children and to teach them Your ways. Lord, help us to steward this life well for Your name’s sake.
In Jesus’ name, amen!
[Aaron] Hey, we’re Aaron and Jennifer Smith with Marriage After God.
[Jennifer] Helping you cultivate an extraordinary marriage.
[Aaron] And today, we’re in part seven of the Marriage After God series. And we’re gonna be talking with Josh and Priscilla Millsap about being good stewards with our finances. Welcome to the Marriage After God podcast, where we believe that marriage was meant for more than just happily ever after.
[Jennifer] I’m Jennifer, also known as UnveiledWife.
[Aaron] And I’m Aaron, also known as HusbandRevolution.
[Jennifer] We have been married for over a decade.
[Aaron] And so far, we have four young children.
[Jennifer] We have been doing marriage ministry online for over seven years through blogging and social media.
[Aaron] With the desire to inspire couples to keep God at the center of their marriage, encouraging them to walk in faith every day.
[Jennifer] We believe the Christian marriage should be an extraordinary one, full of life,
[Jennifer] and power
[Aaron] that can only be found by chasing after God
[Aaron] Thank you for joining us in this journey as we chase boldly after God’s will for our life together.
[Jennifer] This is Marriage After God. Thank you guys so much for joining us this week. We just wanted to take a moment and just encourage you to leave us a review on the Marriage After God podcast. This is just a great way to get the message out there that the podcast is live and that this message is for every marriage. So we just wanted to ask you to go to the bottom of the app and just leave a star-rating review or a comment review.
[Aaron] And also, we want to invite you, the whole reason were doing this 16-part series and all these interviews, is to talk about the Marriage After God book that we wrote together. It’s how you can support this podcast, and we’d just love to get a copy in your hands. It’s called Marriage After God, and you can go to shop.marriageaftergod.com and pick up a copy today. We’d love for you to get a copy.
[Jennifer] So today we have Josh and Priscilla Millsap. Thank you guys so much for being with us today.
Hi, you’re welcome.
Hey! Thanks for having us.
[Jennifer] Would you just take a moment and just let everyone know who you are, how long you’ve been married, how many kids you have, what you do for work, that kind of thing?
[Josh] Well, we are Josh and Priscilla Millsap. We are, let’s see, it’s gonna be 14 years here in June. We have four kids aging from 13 to four–
[Aaron] Wow, awesome.
[Josh] And we do quite a few things when it comes to work, everything from our own business that is Pristine Solutions, where we do window cleaning, screen repairs, and few other little odd-end things as well, and then also I have an outside sales position with a company called Hunter Engineering.
[Priscilla] And I stay home, and I home school, and I help run the business, the window cleaning business as well.
[Aaron] Awesome, so you guys work together and have some other side work. We love that because that’s kind of our story a little bit too. Awesome, so how do we know you guys? How do you know us? Where did we meet?
[Priscilla] I met Jen through my sisterhood Bible study. I think she came with a friend one time, and so we met through then and kinda connected and just via social media have kinda stayed in touch.
[Jennifer] Yep, I’ve been following you for a while. You have such great encouragement too. I always get refreshed when I see your stories up, so I appreciate that.
[Priscilla] Oh, praise God, thank you.
[Aaron] Yeah, and one of the reasons we wanted to interview you guys is because we see you guys as a marriage after God, and that you guys use your talents and resources in many different ways to serve God, so we’re excited to kinda dig into some of those things. But before we do that, we have an icebreaker question.
[Jennifer] A fun question.
[Aaron] Yeah, and since we thought of a question that was around money because we’re gonna be talking about being stewards, and this is a funny one because this has nothing to do with stewardship But if you were given, and both of you gotta answer this, if you were given $100 today, and there’s not gonna be any shame or guilt in what you spent it on–
[Jennifer] No strings attached.
[Aaron] What would you spend it on?
[Priscilla] Oh, well, easily either date night, but selfishly, probably just more Lululemon.
[Aaron] I love that story.
[Jennifer] That’s awesome.
[Priscilla] But go ahead, babe.
[Aaron] They have the best gym shorts.
[Josh] Yeah, it would definitely be a date night. We have one of our favorite restaurants that we haven’t been to in quite a while that we would, that I would definitely use that for.
[Priscilla] Yeah, that’d be fun.
[Jennifer] That’s so awesome, you guys. I love that. Okay, so we’re gonna move on to the quote from Marriage After God from chapter seven. It says, the goal for every marriage after God is to build a healthy and biblical financial foundation so as to be good stewards and good servants with everything God entrusts to us.
[Aaron] Yeah, so how does that, just real quick, when you hear that, do you feel like that is something that is encompassed in your guys’ marriage and life, something you guys are striving towards? What do you guys think?
[Josh] Yes, yeah it is, absolutely. Being a good servant towards God as well as stewards of everything He’s given us is a huge calling as a Christian husband, but also as we grow closer to God, that is definitely what He’s calling us all to do.
[Priscilla] Yeah, and I would say it doesn’t really matter what place you’re in, whether you’re struggling or you’re maybe more, your foundation is a little more secure financially or you’re prospering, whatever you have can be used to help build up the kingdom. I mean, whether your house is big or small, you can still use that. I think sometimes we think we have to have so much more to be a good steward, but technically, whatever you have, and so, no matter where we’ve been at in our process of getting out of debt or whatever, we try to use what we have to benefit others or bless others or build up the local church or stuff like that.
[Aaron] I love that perspective, and it’s exactly what we’re trying to get across in this chapter of the book, being a good and faithful steward is. We sometimes, and I remember, there’s been times in our life, Jennifer, that we would say, well, if we had a little bit more, then we’d give more. If we had a little bit more, we’d save better, or we’d be able to do that one thing that we know that we’ve been desiring to do for God, but you’re right. As long as it’s something out there, we’ll never do it, but if it’s something that we have now, we can be a steward with it and be faithful with the little, or whatever it is now. I love that.
[Jennifer] Yeah, I remember that we were tempted to think that way, but it didn’t take very long for God to kind of prick your heart and get you to lead in a way that encouraged us to be good stewards with even the little bit that we had.
[Aaron] I remember the spirit just saying, hey, if you’re not gonna do it now, why do you think you’ll do it later?
[Priscilla] Exactly, yes, that.
[Jennifer] And Priscilla, I really liked what you said about it doesn’t matter what you’ve been given, whether you’re prosperous or not, because that right there is so relatable to everybody listening right now. So everybody’s accountable and responsible for what they have today, so I just love that we’re starting out the episode with that.
[Priscilla] Yeah. Yeah, ’cause we’ve definitely had–
[Priscilla] Oh, sorry, go ahead.
[Aaron] No, you go ahead.
[Priscilla] Oh, I was just gonna say we’ve definitely had times where it’s like, we’re living out of boxes, and we’re living in someone else’s house, but still even having community with people. I don’t know. We kinda make excuses sometimes for why we don’t jump out there and do more. But that’s a huge encouragement. You don’t have to have a lot to really just bless someone or reach out or have community.
[Aaron] Yeah, you just have to have what God’s given you and then steward it well. Use it for Him, use it for your family, and not squander it. So how would you define being a good and faithful steward over what God has given you guys? We’ve mentioned some of it, but how do you define that in your life?
[Josh] Well, being a good and faithful steward, if we look at Matthew chapter 25, when he actually talks about the talents, the story of the talents, it really has to deal with resources, not necessarily a monetary thing, so learning how to use everything that God has given us in a proper perspective of a Christian not owning anything but being in charge of what everything God has given us in total resources, family, friends, influence, whatever it may be, understanding that our role is not to own but to simply manage on God’s behalf is a huge thing for me.
[Priscilla] Yeah. I think just using that perspective–
[Aaron] That was a really good quote real quick.
[Priscilla] With all of our, it’s easy to grip on tight to what you have, but stuff comes and goes, right?
[Aaron] Yeah, always. I love that quote you said, what was it? I almost forgot it. Oh, we don’t own things, we manage things.
[Aaron] And I love that.
[Jennifer] So how does our stewardship affect what God is inviting us to do, whether that’s good or bad?
[Aaron] If we steward well or steward poorly, how does those actions affect, how when we’re being invited by God to do something, when we’re chasing after God, does it matter?
[Josh] Yes, it does.
[Josh] Especially in that Matthew 25 section is, while you can see that God honors and blesses the good and faithful stewards with more, and yet the one who decided he was not going to do anything with it and basically be a sloth with it or lazy with it was punished. So he really does value those that make sure that they have a proper mindset about how God has blessed their life versus those who just sit on it and take advantage of it and not use it to bless God.
[Jennifer] Was there a point in your guys’ marriage when you guys looked at your finances and said, we have to change? It wasn’t going in the direction that you wanted it to go, it wasn’t lining up biblically, and you just knew?
[Priscilla] Oh, girl.
[Josh] Yes, yes, yes, yes.
[Priscilla] Let me tell you.
[Aaron] Tell us, tell us, yeah.
[Priscilla] Yeah, we struggled. I mean, I think we just kinda saw the way our parents lived, but obviously, they’re 25 years or so ahead of us, but we’re seeing the way they live, and we’re trying to match that with making nothing-burger amounts of money an hour. And so we really got into a lot of debt, including like he already had student-loan debt before I came in the picture, so when we got married, we were already about $100,000 in debt, which is crazy ’cause I was 19, and he was 23. So that’s how we started off our marriage. Also, not to mention, I was pregnant, so that’s a story for another day. So there is already just so much going on there, and it just made it really stressful, so we really limped along for about two-and-a-half years, and had someone not stepped in and gave us some resources, we probably would be divorced. But my dad actually gave us The Total Money Makeover for Christmas.
[Aaron] From Dave Ramsey?
[Priscilla] Yes, yes, Dave Ramsey’s Total Money Makeover, and we literally sat and read it on New Year’s Eve, and then that new year we just decided to change our life. And we were what he would call gazelle-intense, and sell everything but the kids, have garage sales. So that was like, okay, this is a real plan and a real hope for us, ’cause I think we knew the direction we wanted to go. We just felt like we couldn’t get there or didn’t really know what to do or have a steady plan in place. So that was a real game-changer for us.
[Jennifer] Awesome. So, when you started to make those changes in your life, did you have little victories that encouraged you and motivated you? Can you share a little bit about that?
[Josh] Yeah, those were kind of fun because when we were in that so much debt, there was so much tension built around just about every aspect of life because, as a husband, my wife was so stressed about the money and the bills were coming in, and as a husband you kind of feel like a failure when your wife is in such a stressful position in something that you should be able to handle, finances with work. And so it was, when we finally got on the same page and saw a future in the direction that we wanted to move in, when we would pay off those off little bills and we would get those things out from underneath us, the weight that was lifted off was just huge, and we could finally feel victory and direction in a way that we knew was God-honoring as well.
[Priscilla] I think I remember–
[Jennifer] That’s so awesome.
[Priscilla] Yeah, like our first garage sale we had, we made $500, which was so exciting, but we were trying to get that first step of get a little $1,000 emergency fund, so that was even a very real, tangible victory there. And yeah, our whole life shifted pretty fast. So there was a lot of things. Obviously, the tension between us lifted, like you said, and we actually went back to church ’cause we hadn’t been to church in a while, and we started giving. So there was lots of little shifts that happened very quickly.
[Aaron] So you guys started giving during this season of, this gazelle-like sprint?
[Priscilla] Oh, right away, right away. Now, I wouldn’t say it was high. We hadn’t even been in church regularly, and so we were like, oh, well this is telling us we need to give, so I guess we should go back to church if we’re gonna do that.
[Jennifer] That’s awesome.
[Aaron] Go, Dave Ramsey.
[Priscilla] We go back to church, and we just were like, okay, Lord, we’re gonna just step out in faith and do $25 a week, which was a lot for us at the time, ’cause we were drowning in debt. And then, I think probably a few months in we went to $50 a week, and probably six months into this journey we were at a full-blown tithe, but yeah, God really just honored even that little bit of just stepping out in faith.
[Jennifer] Wow, that’s so awesome, you guys. I think I said “awesome” already so many times already in this episode, but I really appreciate your guys’ transparency, and I think that the first thing that comes to my mind as you were sharing is that a lot of people are gonna understand that weight that you felt underneath that debt, and there’s probably even people, couples listening who are under that weight of debt. But how encouraging it is to hear that even something like a garage sale and getting your feet, jumping in or running like a gazelle, like you said, toward that to accomplish it, those little victories matter so much. So I just wanted that to be a note and an encouragement for them to hear. So I just appreciate you sharing that, because I think that if they, hopefully, this excites them so that they start making action steps toward their debt and getting free.
[Priscilla] Yeah, that’s so, so important, yeah, little victories to motivate you.
[Aaron] So, I got a question. Are you guys debt-free?
We are not
[Priscilla] currently debt-free, no.
[Aaron] Okay, which is totally fine, but my second question to this is do you guys live now in a, what we call in the book, a debt-free mentality?
[Priscilla] Yeah, so just to be totally transparent, we got very, very close on our journey. We did pay off all those student loans. We paid off all our credit-card debt. We were driving paid-for cars.
[Priscilla] So we got there. Last year, we made some career changes that did, we did make the decision together to take on a little bit of debt. That was really, really hard for us to do because of the journey that we’ve been on, but we really felt like this was the path forward. And there’s been so many crazy, cool things since making that shift ’cause we really had to, yeah, we had give up some things. There was a lot of sacrifice there, so but it’s been really cool to see what the Lord’s doing with that. So but now, yes, we’re back on that track, so it kinda feels like we’ve gone back to square one, but we’ve done it before, and we’re gonna do it again.
[Jennifer] That’s so awesome to hear.
[Aaron] So I love that ’cause I want everyone listening, ’cause most of the country is in debt–
[Aaron] And our heart in this chapter in this part of the book is to say just because everyone’s doing it doesn’t mean we should do it.
[Priscilla] Exactly, totally.
[Aaron] And so, that debt-free mentality is, whether you’re in debt or not, that you begin to act like you would be when you’re out of debt.
[Aaron] Meaning you don’t overspend, which is Dave Ramsey’s model anyway. It’s like, spend within your means, save, pay off your debt. But I wanna ask you guys, the getting out of debt is awesome, and I don’t wanna over-spiritualize getting out of debt, but why does it matter that we get out of debt? Why does it matter that you guys are faithful and good stewards with your money? It’s not just for the sake of being debt-free and, oh, good for us, we’re debt-free now. Why is it? What’s the big deal?
[Priscilla] Oh man, okay, so I don’t know where this verse is in the Bible. Maybe someone can find it later. But the one where it talks about running the race and laying aside every weight, you know what I mean? Being in debt isn’t necessarily a sin. I mean, there’s sin at the core of that, and that’s how you got there or whatever, but it’s just running the race for the Lord and having a healthy marriage and a healthy family, it just creates so much stress, and you kinda have, if a lot of your focus is there, and it could be an indicator of where your heart is at, and it’s different for each person, I suppose. But if your focus is on your financial woes, and oftentimes, seven to eight out of 10 people are living paycheck to paycheck. That’s stressful, and a lot of that is because we have gotten ourselves in these monumental piles of debt, and we can’t think straight. We can’t focus on other things, or you’re having to work so much to pay all this off. When you’re mentally spent, and you’re physically spent on just trying to pay for your lifestyle, you can’t really focus on the things that are the most important, like discipling your kids, and building up the local church, and loving on people around you. And you’re also, there’s a lot of opportunities you’re gonna have to say no to because financially you just don’t have the means, or things you want to support, so it just becomes a weight, really, like a noose around your neck that you can’t, you have very limited freedom on the opportunities and things you’re able to do.
[Josh] Yeah. I was gonna, to piggyback on that, that we are the example to our kids that, as we deal with money, as we deal with stress, as we deal with debt, our kids are watching how we behave, how we deal with, how do we overcome the struggles of something may not go our way for a month or something. How do we deal with that, and are we faithful to God in prayer? Are we understanding that He provides everything for us and that ultimately we’re gonna trust in what He has planned for us? Or are we gonna sit there and blame each other, blame the world? How are we gonna deal with things that don’t go our way? And our kids are always watching, so as we have a proper perspective of our role as Christians within the confines of what God gives us, they are watching, and they are learning.
[Jennifer] Gosh, Josh, that is so good, and I just love that you went there because we all, as parents, need to be reminded about the impact we’re having in our children’s lives and the foundation that we’re setting them up for, and I just, that is so good and so right on, which kind of leads me into this next question. Because I follow Priscilla on social media, I saw a picture of her daughter recently with a bunch of bottles in front of her, baby bottles filled with money. So I want you guys to explain that and explain kind of that example that you’re setting for your kids and how you’re incorporating them into what you guys are doing.
[Priscilla] Yeah, so, I mean, we really try to keep it super simple for them. That actually was our Bible study got together and collected some money for a local organization here called Corona Life Services, which is basically a pregnancy crisis clinic, and so that was really cool. But they actually were the ones, my kids actually were the ones that even went around our neighborhood, just talking to people about Corona Life Services. And I think–
[Aaron] That is so cool.
[Priscilla] Yeah, it was really, really cool. And who’s gonna say no to kids? So that’s a great way-So, I mean, it’s like, some money, send your kids. No, I’m just kidding. But, so we–
[Aaron] It’s good strategy.
[Priscilla] Yeah No, but it’s funny, actually, because we just got, you get, at the end of the year you get your giving statement from your church or whatever, and each of our kids actually had one because they go and they put their money in, they fill out the little envelope.
[Aaron] That’s really cool.
[Priscilla] But we had just basically taught them spend, save, give, like, what you’re earning, ’cause our kids are hustlers, man. They’ve seen us just hustle for the last few years, and they’re like, we want to hustle. What could we do? So they’ve done all kinds of things. And so, they have their own bank accounts, and we go to the bank, they fill out their own thing, and so, once they have so much in a little stockpile, it’s like, okay, this you get to spend, this we’re gonna take to the bank, and this you’re taking to church on Sunday. So we just keep it simple and just hopefully forming those good habits now ’cause I mean, I literally remember getting my first paycheck, and I’m like, I’m going straight to Guess and buying a pair of jeans. But already our kids are like, I’m not spending that kind of money. They’re very frugal. Well, one of them is not, but we won’t put her on blast. So But for the most part, yes.
[Aaron] But those skills are amazing for them to learn now. Like you said, you’re building habits that we necessarily didn’t have growing up. I’m sure maybe our parents tried in some ways, but just the intentionality of saying it’s not just money and that we use it for ourselves, but this is actually something that’s God’s giving us, and how are we gonna manage it?
[Priscilla] And they’re learning to hold it loosely at a young age, you know what I mean?
[Priscilla] I actually saw my son do something that sort of blew my hair back, and then I was convicted that it blew my hair back ’cause I’m like, that should be everyone. But we were doing a gift for someone, and we were kinda pulling some money together. We made this cute little thing with it, and just for a family we wanted to love on, and a bunch of people came together and did this. And I’m like, hey, I asked my kids, I’m like, you guys wanna participate in this? And it’s not like, hey, we’ve got some money, and you have to participate, but I want them to want to? And my son, I was like, just a couple bucks we could tie on there or five bucks. And my son comes in with a $20 bill, and I’m like, baby, you know what I mean, it’s fine, just grab a five or something. This sounds horrible, right? Maybe we should make this podcast anonymous, but–
[Priscilla] He’s all, well, I don’t need it. He’s like–
[Priscilla] And I was like, oh my gosh. Why did I just try to talk my son out of giving? What’s wrong with me? But it just blessed me so much.
[Aaron] Are you sure you want to give that much?
[Priscilla] How much do we have? And it’s like, we have stuff we don’t really need, but anyways, it’s cool to see them forming those habits and holding it loosely and not being. I think it’s easy to just want to hold onto everything you have, but and you just don’t know, what the seasons come and go, and so.
[Jennifer] Well, good for you guys. We commend you for teaching your children rightly and righteously, and I just hope that this is an encouragement for all of us parents today to be leading our children the way the Bible calls us to.
[Aaron] Yeah, and I have another question for you guys. We’re getting down to the end. But again, going back to what we were talking about. The whole purpose of all this is we’re not just good stewards for the sake of good stewardship. We’re not just savers for the sake of having more money. We’re not just debt-free mentality just for the sake of getting out of debt. God’s got something for us to do. He’s got a ministry for his body to be working in, and we’re a part of that body. And I noticed in your Instagram feed that you guys, I don’t know if you guys are still doing this, but you’ve hosted Financial Peace University classes at your home for other people. What motivated you guys to do that, not just for yourselves, but now you’re like, hey, let’s bring other people into this?
[Priscilla] That’s exactly it. We just wanted to see people have victory in their financial lives. I mean, really for us, it turned our whole life around.
[Priscilla] It wasn’t just turned our bank account around.
[Priscilla] Our marriage was struggling. Our finances were struggling. We were just struggling, all of it, spiritually, we were struggling big time. So it really just, it was a catalyst to get us on the right track. And not everybody’s in that dire of a circumstance, but for sure–
[Aaron] But many are, financially.
[Priscilla] Yeah, and really, accountability for us, continuing to do that, and then just yeah, really wanting to see people’s eyes open to the possibilities of when we’re giving like we should, when we’re saving like we should, and when we’re managing our money like we should, there’s opportunity there.
[Josh] Yeah, but I mean, and you kind of alluded to it a little while earlier. In high school and in school we’re not taught how to deal with money for the most part. We go to school, we learn what we need to learn, but we’re not really instructed on how this world works around money, and so going these Financial Peace or the Dave Ramsey, we actually got an understanding of how money works. And so we saw frustration and stress on a lot of other couple’s faces, and it wasn’t that they were struggling with anything necessarily huge, but you could just see that desire to want to get beyond where they were at, but not have the knowledge or the ability to really understand what they needed to do. And so, we would kinda just make the suggestion, like, hey, well, this really helped not only our marriage, but an understanding of a direction that God really wanted us to go with our money.
[Aaron] I love that, and it’s you guys ministering to other couples and helping them mature, helping them grow, walking with them as you are also walking in these things. And what’s funny is that, or not funny, but what’s amazing is when we walk in obedience in little areas, and I see money as a little area, even though it feels so big, but it’s a little area because, once we figure it out and get control of it and start walking rightly in it, it just starts happening, making more sense and working better. It doesn’t mean we’re gonna be wealthy, but if we’re out of debt, we’re already wealthier than 90% of the country, right?
[Aaron] Just because you’re out of debt, even if you only made a minimum-wage job.
[Aaron] But I just love that we serve God in those little things, and it makes it easier for us to serve God in bigger things. And I’m sure as you guys do this it’s easier for you to open your homes for other things. It’s easier for you to go, and like you said, you gave a little bit each week, and then you gave more. That’s a perfect example of us walking in faith, being faithful with a little, and being able to be faithful with much.
[Jennifer] Yeah, and what I think is cool is that in your obedience to managing your finances well, you experienced those mini-victories–
[Aaron] Yeah, those little wins.
[Jennifer] or large victories, and that motivated you to say you can do it too, and you reached out to other people.
[Jennifer] And that’s a large part of the message of Marriage After God. The book is to inspire couples to say, what have we experienced, what have we walked through that we can then encourage other people with?
[Aaron] You can do it too.
[Jennifer] And say you can do it too. So I just, I think that’s so awesome that you guys have done that and are still continuing to do ministry together as a team for God in even other ways. So, super awesome.
[Aaron] So I got two more questions for you. The second-to-last one is this. If you can encourage our listeners right now with two things that they can do that’ll help them gain victory in the area of finances and just being good stewards, what would you say?
[Priscilla] Oh, gosh, two things. Well, one, get on a budget. Get on a budget. Get on, write down a budget. That would be, you need to start there, knowing how much you’re even spending and what you’ve got coming in, going out. We can’t just walk around in the dark.
[Josh] Yeah, it’s hard to imagine, but there are couples out there that either one or both really have no idea how much comes in and how much is going out.
[Priscilla]Yeah. And then, gosh, I would just say start giving. I think that stepping out in faith is so important, and really just trusting the Lord to, just trusting the Lord with that. It’s so tempting, especially when you’re in a tough spot, to want to hold on to what you have. And like I said, you don’t have to be like, okay, 10% right away. Start with just something that you’re gonna be committed to and yeah, I would say give.
[Aaron] Right, which is practicing generosity, practicing obedience of giving to those that are teaching you and maturing you. I love that.
[Josh] Yeah, it also feels literally intuitive.
[Jennifer] Awesome, guys.
[Josh] You want to, in the moment when you’re trying to save and pay off debt, it doesn’t make sense to give something away in that kind of a setting. But as we’re obedient to what God’s word calls us to do, and that’s something that he puts a great importance on, then he sees that as that step of faith, and that’s a good thing.
[Aaron] I love that. I think of, when you just said the world obedience, and I think of the story of the rich young ruler going to Jesus and saying, Jesus, how do I get to heaven? And He says, follow the commands, and he’s, I’ve done all these commands. And He says, one thing you lack. And He says, go and sell all that you have, give to the poor, and follow me. And I think a lot of people have taken that, the poverty gospel, and saying, oh, if you have things, you’re not holy. If you things, you’re not, but that’s not what’s actually happening.
[Aaron] Jesus has given a command to this man, and he disobeyed it.
[Aaron] So, the problem, He says, the thing you lack is obedience to me. He says, sell all you have, give it to the poor, and follow me. And he walks away sad because he’s got much wealth. He would rather enamored and enveloped in his wealth than be obedient to Christ.
[Josh] Well, and his wealth–
[Aaron] And so, like you said, that obedience–
[Josh] His wealth had given him a comfort level that he was really used to, and he was fine with attaining righteousness along with his wealth, but he didn’t understand what that cost was really going to be, and it was hard. He didn’t want to do it.
[Aaron] Yeah. And the cost is, like I was getting at, is obedience. Christ wants obedience. And so, like you said, you practice that obedience. It may be counterintuitive–
[Priscilla] Yes, exactly.
[Aaron] But He wants generous hearts in His body. He wants generous givers. He wants people that trust Him, and I just love that. Thank you for that.
[Jennifer] Okay, you guys, we’re moving on to the last question, and it is this. In your own words, what is a marriage after God?
[Josh] In our words, a marriage after God. It’s really understanding your role as a Christian, as a husband, as a wife, to know that we are servants. We are, again, we don’t control, we don’t own anything, that God has put us here as servants to manage what He has given us, and as we are found faithful with what He’s given us, He can trust us then with more, day in and day out, not only with money, finances, but resources, what we have at our disposal to do things to influence our friends, to bear each other’s burdens, to really be able to dive into people’s lives and be able to help and lift in a way that’s practical as well as spiritually helpful.
[Aaron] Mm, I love that. Amen, wow.
[Aaron] Yeah, go ahead, ’cause–
[Priscilla] Oh, I was just, my word for the year is surrender, and so, really just, I mean, me personally, but just really surrendering, kind of our ideas of what our life should look like, and we’ve, man, we’ve had a rollercoaster of a year, and we just couldn’t even have anticipated what all that was gonna look like, but really, just continue to press into the Lord and press into each other and keeping short account, staying vulnerable, really challenging ourselves to really be praying together often. So just really seeking the Lord together and being on the same page.
[Jennifer] Mm, that’s good.
[Aaron] Praise God. Well, Josh, Priscilla, we are so happy to have interviewed you guys, and we thank you for your guys’ honesty and openness in sharing your guys’ journey, because that’s where, I mean, everyone’s on a journey. And the goal is, as marriages after God, that we’re all chasing after God, and it doesn’t mean that we’re all at the same place in our walks, but that we’re all going the same direction.
[Aaron] And we say this throughout the book, unity, one mind, one heart, one spirit, with one mission, and so I just, I thank you guys, I commend you guys, and I pray that you guys would continue on that journey of getting out of debt so that you guys can just continue to serve more and more and give more and more, and we love that, so thank you. And so, what we’re gonna do is we’re gonna end in prayer, and then I’m gonna close us out, so join us. Dear Lord, thank you for giving us the resources we need to accomplish the mission you have for us. Thank you for showing us in your word how to be good stewards with what we have. We pray that as Christian husbands and wives we would walk in wisdom when it comes to our finances. May we be on the same page in marriage, and may we communicate with each other as we submit to you. We pray that we would not waste the things that you have given us, but instead, we pray we would invest them for your kingdom. We pray that we would see everything that we have, our marriage, our children, our assets, our time, all of it, as gifts you have given to us to steward well. Please help us to be an example in the world of how to live righteously. Help us to be an example to our children and to teach them your ways. Lord, help us to steward this life well for your name’s sake. In Jesus’ name, amen.
[Aaron] All right, so hey, we just thank everyone that’s been listening to this interview. We hope you were blessed by it. We pray that you have some things to talk about as a couple, and this is episode seven in our 16-part series, and so we look forward to having you over the next episodes. See you next week.
[Aaron] Did you enjoy today’s show? If you did, it would mean the world to us if you could leave us a review on iTunes. Also, if you’re interested, you can find many more encouraging stories and resources at marriageaftergod.com, and let us help you cultivate an extraordinary marriage.