Writen by: Unveiled Wife On July 14, 2013

I Feel Hopeless And Alone… But God Says “You Are Not Alone!”

Do you ever feel as if you are all alone?alone

Alone in your situation, in your struggles, alone in your marriage, alone in this world…

There have been countless times I feel hopeless and alone. So often we believe the lie that we are all alone. Our hopelessness fuels the lie and our strength dwindles as we sink further into isolation. Silent sufferers.

I wanted to share a message with you today that I hope will encourage you, bolster your faith, and increase your strength. Please read the story below from 1 Kings 19:9-18

And the word of the Lord came to him: “What are you doing here, Elijah?”

10 He replied, “I have been very zealous for the Lord God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, torn down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too.”

11 The Lord said, “Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the Lord, for the Lord is about to pass by.”

Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. 12 After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper.13 When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.

Then a voice said to him, “What are you doing here, Elijah?”

14 He replied, “I have been very zealous for the Lord God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, torn down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too.”

15 The Lord said to him, “Go back the way you came, and go to the Desert of Damascus. When you get there, anoint Hazael king over Aram. 16 Also, anoint Jehu son of Nimshi king over Israel, and anoint Elisha son of Shaphat from Abel Meholahto succeed you as prophet. 17 Jehu will put to death any who escape the sword of Hazael, and Elisha will put to death any who escape the sword of Jehu. 18 Yet I reserve seven thousand in Israel—all whose knees have not bowed down to Baal and whose mouths have not kissed him.”

Elijah believed that he was all alone. In fact he had the lie on repeat, didn’t he?! Twice God asks Elijah a question and Elijah responded both times convinced that he was all alone.

Amidst the chaos, the loud noise, the fierce conditions of what was happening around him… God whispers, “You are not alone!”

God had a plan. God had purpose for Elijah. God had a huge group of people waiting for Elijah. Elijah was not alone. God called Elijah out of isolation to make relationships with other people. And my friend you are not alone! God is calling you out of isolation, inviting you to make relationships with other people.

Despite your circumstance, despite your sin, despite all of the fierce conditions happening around you and despite the lie you have been listening to…you are not alone.

God is whispering to you now…”You are not alone!”

There are women who are waiting to hear about your struggles, waiting to relate to your story, waiting to rally alongside you and help you as you help them. It is time to break the silence. It is time to allow God’s voice to comfort your heart. It is time to glorify God through your suffering as you acknowledge the truth of God.

You are not alone.

If you feel as if you are alone and you want to break the silence… please leave a comment below and share your testimony. If you read a testimony below and relate, please reply and let us rally alongside each other to affirm, encourage and strengthen one another in Jesus’ name!

Unveiled Wife

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My name is Jennifer and I began this BLOG to share my journey as a wife, unveiled, uncovered and wide open, to purge my heart of the pain I have encountered AND to encourage other women in the world who are, have been, or will soon be wives... READ MY STORY HERE

Join The Discussion, Leave A Comment Below!

  • andy s

    Thats tough. He’s lucky to have you. You deserve better

  • Too caring

    thanks and I do agree about the boundaries.

  • http://unveiledwife.com/ Unveiled Wife

    I think because you two are not married you should consider boundaries. Also, perhaps you should seek wise counsel like a women’s pastor at a church.

  • http://unveiledwife.com/ Unveiled Wife

    Don’t ever stop praying and asking God to guide you! Also find someone you trust to walk you through this such as a mentor or a counselor!

  • Tonya Filleman

    Jaylynn….I feel your pain. My husband is an alcoholic. He has been to rehab twice, we’ve been separated….and we are currently legally separated tough he has moved back into the basement for financial reasons. All I can say is God is always with you…I have grown so much closer to God through the 17 years that I have dealt with this. We have 4 children and I’ve often have had to put my husband to the side to be a mom fully and not a depressed, uninvolved mom because of my situation. You need to remember that he has the problem…and yes, you love him, but he has to want to get help….and if he isn’t ready, no matter how much you nag or try to get him to get help, it won’t matter. The first time my husband went to rehab it was due to my nagging….he was drunk less than a week out of a 30 day rehab. He wasn’t ready. I had to learn that he is an adult and he has to live with the consequences of his actions. I don’t bend over backwards for him anymore….but I am still his wife…so I still act like it and love him….but I don’t cover for him at work anymore, I don’t hide it from people….my mental health and my childrens mental health has got to be my first priority and I would encourage you to make your mental health your first priority as well…..after God of course….because God is your rock. He is your “husband”…lean into Him.

  • Rachael Lane Worley

    CK, believe it or not, YOUR doubts can’t cause your husband doubt. He chooses to feel that way. I am praying with you! God is FOR your marriage and he can do anything. :)

  • CK

    Thank you for giving me courage – my own doubts have caused my husband doubt. I have started see a pshycologist and it is helping. Will you please pray with me for restoration of our marriage and open his heart to receive my love.
    May God keep on blessing you and your family. Kind regards

  • CK

    Your story seems so familiar – my own insecurities has nearly destroyed us too. BUT it’s not over yet – God is a loving Father who looks after His children. Lord please bless and repair Kristy’s marriage as only You can – amen

  • CK

    Lord please bless this family – heal and protect them – I pray for You my Father to intervene and repair – amen

  • MaryLynn

    I pray for my Husband Everyday, We will be Married 11 years in Oct, I’d love to say they have been 11 happy years but I’d be lying. I can say I have 2 Beautiful Girls that I wouldn’t trade for anything. Their are so many issues I don’t even know where to start. My Husband has a problem managing money meaning if he has it he is going to find a way to spend it. Recently I found out he has been Gambling and blew his paycheck on scratch off tickets. and looking back over the years I can now see where a lot of our bill money went. We lost our home to foreclosure last year because he was out of work almost 3 year and only worked odd jobs and spent most of that money too, But I didn’t give up hope I still prayed for him. I have seen a big blessing in the loss of our home so I don’t really blame him, but I know he didn’t make it easy. Most of the time I fill like his doormat, because he will do anything for anybody that needs his help even not do something for or with the family to help someone else, but I have to do everything around the house from Cleaning to Cooking to taking care of the Girls the Dog and all of his stuff too. HE has no idea how to show emotions and respond to mine. There are a few Me days when I get to go to my Ladies Bible Studies and what not, but when I come home he normally has made more work for me to do. Mostly because he has a addiction to video games and sadly Porn and he tries to hide it from me, but can’t always. I got rid of our cell phones so he couldn’t watch it on his anymore so he has to use the computer when I’m Not Home. He has no idea what this is doing to our “Love Life” he can’t see a Problem with it, and I can’t help but feel less of myself for it. I pray for him and I let him know how hurt I am but he has very little emotions and most of the time I feel he doesn’t really care. I stay married to him because 1. I do really love him even though I wonder if he really loves me and I made a Vow to God for Better or Worse, 2 I stay for my Girls I really don’t want them to grow up in a split family. 3. I know deep Down God can heal his Additions and break him free of Temptations. I know there is a wonderful man inside of him, I see him from time to time, but I feel all alone most of the time.

  • Zuleyma

    Me and my husband have been together for 8 years. We have a 6 year old together and I had him when I was still a teenager. We have gone through a lot of struggles during the years and many breakups. But this one is one of the worst that even ended with a no contact order. I still love my husband very much and it hurts not knowing if we are ever gonna get back together I feel really hopeless at times. I’ve been praying and I don’t want to lose hope but I cant help is sometimes. I know god can restore marriages but I cant help but question if he wants to restore mine. At the moment I’m the only one who wants to fix this because I know my husband doesn’t. He also has to attend anger anger management classes for 18 months and during that time we still cant have any contact. I feel like he will just forget me during that time and not even care and move on and it scares me. I would really appreciate some advice because I just don’t know what to do anymore.

  • Melita Lanning Trammell

    Rejoice Marriage Ministries has been such a blessing in my stand. I also recommend them.

  • Melita Lanning Trammell

    I would love to hear your testimony.

  • Kristy

    I am isolated myself from friends because I feared their
    rejection. I isolated myself from my marriage because of my insecurities and
    selfish motivations. I felt alone and I left my husband felling alone. My
    husband wants a divorce and it is so hard because I had final realized I was
    not the wife God meant for me to and I was trying to change that. I am still trying
    to change, to open my heart to follow God’s path for me, to be the wife and
    person God wants me to be. Please pray for me to never forget that I am not
    alone, that God will be there for me. That God will surround me with people who
    will support me and help me to grow into the person he wants me to be. Please pray
    for my marriage, that my husband will see that divorce is not the answer to our
    problems. That God will work in our lives and in our marriage to transform us
    and our marriage. A friend introduced me to the unveiled wife shortly before I found
    out my husband wanted a divorce and it has been a blessing.

  • Tiffany

    My husband is the son of a recovered alcoholic. We both differ in our spiritual walks and he has always struggled with alcohol. It consumed our marriage for a long time to the point I would have to wake our young children to collect him in the early hours of the morning. Each time it happened I would feel so alone, discouraged, angry…the list goes on. Trying to point out the sin he was committing only made things worse. Trying to help him only led to him refusing he had a problem…after all he didn’t drink all day every day. There are different kinds of drinking problems…my husband was a binger, and wasn’t the nicest when drunk…not abusive but I hated seeing him drunk. I did what I could…confided in a very close friend who was my spiritual rock to cling to, she would pray for myself and my husband. I prayed. I wept. Had things not turned around when they did I would have gone further and contacted Al-Anon, members are those who have partners/family/friends who are alcoholics. We have also had issues with spiritual warfare because of his drinking.

    After years of prayer and tears, we are not there 100% but he has fixated his addictive personality onto the gym and does that now instead of drinking. Whilst I don’t necessarily agree with him pouring in all his spare time, effort and money and almost deify-ing the gym, it is much better than alcohol and much less detrimental to our relationship.

    My encouragement to you is that this blackness you see will end…God knows what you can handle.

    “So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall! No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.” – 1 Corinthians 10:12-13

    It can be tempting to run from your problems but I encourage you to love and pray for your husband more and more. His behaviour is NOT acceptable but he still deserves your prayers. You just never know when God will help him turn the corner.

  • Billie Thomas Gray

    We have been married a little over a year and it has been very hard. Our daughter is 7 months and I am 9 weeks pregnant. I also have a 14 year old from a previous marriage. My life is consumed by the kids and house. We are both full time students so finding time for us is difficult. I am a stay at home mom which I have never been before so I’m learning each day. The biggest problem I have is that my husband talks to other women online and is seeking a sexual relationship with them. This has been happening since BEFORE we got married. He has yet to cross that boundary but I’m afraid that one day he will. I feel hopeless most days but think that is partly due to postpartum depression. My husband thinks I should just get over it. This is the lowest point in my life which I didn’t think was possible after the death of my sister 3 years ago. I know that there are things I am epically failing at as a wife and God is working those out. I try to be there for my husband but he pushes me away. I know that a praying wife is a strong wife. I’m just losing ground daily. My children are suffering because I’m so consumed with working his attention. Frustrated!

  • Carrie

    Right now everything is so wrong my guy left me me doe the second time while I was pregnant and now I wonder all those times he said he loved me did he really mean it. How can I believe he did when he leaves at the time I need him the most now he’s talking with girl he left us for and is just being a child about everything just being mean all the time and I’m what what did I ever do to you I keep asking myself should I have hope for this man who is not saved i mean can i call him an unbeliever when he does believe on God but never talked about it.

  • Jaylynn

    I have my husband with a drinking problem and I’m tired of being second to alcohol. I feel alone and don’t know where to turn. I love him but he needs help and so do I.

  • Emily

    I want to encourage you!! Marriage is hard and I have felt alone and hopeless too!! But we serve a living God who can resurrect your marriage!! I will be praying for you and your husband and that God will restore and heal and that he will give you peace. I learned that I have to let God be in control of my marriage and pray without ceasing. I hope you have a wonderful week!!

  • Yvette

    Praise God! I’m looking forward to reading your testimony! My husband & I have been separated for over a year now. BUT I am standing, praying, believing, expecting a miracle. God has taken me on an incredible Spiritual journey that has included showing me how I failed as a wife. God told me I had to get my life right with Him during this time and that’s what I’ve been spending my time doing.

  • Blissfully Made


  • Blissfully Made

    Yes, keep praying God changes everything, also ask God to heal your heart first, so that you can pray for your husband. You will see with time the great process and don’t forget to read The Word of God. Also buy yourself some christian books on those topics. It will help, God uses anything He pleases to help you through your difficult time, I promise..God bless you and your not alone.

  • Beautiful wife

    Thank you…I definitely want to hear it. My husband has verbally, emotionally, and mentally abused me (again since we were in counseling). He stopped since I confronted him on it but there has been no repentance or anything to show he will work towards not doing it again. I know he’s afraid to deal with what has led to him to behave this way (I’m assuming since we started the process once already…well technically 3 times), but it hard not to feel betrayed and devalued. And also afraid that he’s not willing to change at all. Hearing other women’s testimonies of healing and redemption helps me put my trust in God rather than in fixing my husband.

  • Rachael Lane Worley

    I am going to bookmark this page because I want to come back here over the weekend and share my husband’s and I’s testimony of how God completely restored our marriage after physical and verbal abuse, anger, separation, and infidelity all in the four and a half years we were married at the time. By God’s hand, we recently celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary. Please be encouraged ladies! God is for your marriage. It’s easier to leave and quit on your marriage (not condemning anyone who has). It takes an amazing strong woman to stay and fight for your husband and for your marriage. I am praying for all of you!

  • Rachel

    Thank you for this wonderful blog post, it is such a blessing to me this morning. Our marriage has survived 7 years so far, we went through 2 separations the last one being very close to divorce when God really opened our eyes and began to show us how He intended for us to be together all along and we needed Him at the center of our relationship. Since we have been back together, it has been a roller coaster. A lot of days I feel like throwing in the towel wondering how God could really want me to be in this. I know when staying close to God and listening to Him that He does want me here. But it’s so easy to believe the lie that it would be easier to give up. I feel alone a lot but I know it’s a lie… I pray that I (and you other ladies dealing with feeling hopeless and alone) will draw strength from God in these times of need. Remember He is always with us, He is the one who put us together, and He will be the one keep us together.

  • Beautiful wife

    This so spoke to me. I’ve been married 2 years this August and it has been horrible. My husband suffers from mental illness (depression, anxiety, and attachment disorder). We’ve been separated and this last time things got better…we were both in counseling and moving forward. My husband got his dream job and now we live away from everything and everyone I know. I don’t even have a job. To top it off, my husband has returned to how things were at their worst and refuses to get help. I feel so alone and helpless. I feel like he lied to me just to get me back. Now I am also battling depression and anxiety. And we still haven’t found a church to plug in to.

  • Es

    There is so much I can relate to after reason these comments!… my heart breaks for each struggle I read. I am praying for you all. Be encouraged though. Somehow, someway my marriage was restored. I felt a lot of what you ladies are feeling too. I pray you all find love peace and comfort in Christ and that he will direct your steps on how to be the wife you were called to be. God bless!

  • 00iyok00

    Trust in God. He will restore broken relationships. Don’t let teh devil take that from you.
    I was an atheist saved me four years ago. Then He restored my relationship with my mom after being separated for more than seven years and other such miracles in my life.
    I’ve been standing for my marriage since He saved me. Four years of wearing my wedding ring and vowing to my husband that regardless of how he feels, my trust is in God and I will wait for him until I grow old or the Lord take me because my vows were not just with my husband but also with God. There were four spirits the moment we said our vows my husband, myself, the pastor and GOD. If I break my vows again it will be to God not my husband. God is my husband now until God says its time for my husband to return.
    This is not so much about being alone, feeling alone, it’s about trusting God and His word.
    Who do you trust? The world or God?
    May a recommend you read Becoming a Titus 2 Woman, also have you heard of the Steinkamps website for standers whether you are in your marriage still and standing or already separated.
    Prayer partners so that you don’t feel alone and aren’t alone. A strong married woman who can teach you about how to stay strong in the Lord.
    God does restore broken marriages and relationships. I know GOD will restore marriages because GOD hates divorce.
    Do you trust God? How big is your faith, size of a mustard seed?
    What are you reading or relying on to teach you how to be a Godly wife?
    Your bible is your the most important book you’ll need everything else is secondary.
    Trust in God, you are not alone, ever.
    Bless you all. May God give you strength and knowledge that He is with you always and He will restore your marriages.

  • Tabitha Johnson

    Im not sure if you live close to me in Norco Ca…but I wiuld love to help u…
    In His Grip < Tab

  • wanda

    Shaina I’m to tell you your not alone. My name is Wanda, my husband says he loves me, but he hurt me deeply. He tell me every day he loves me and he only comes to me when he wants my attention, All I wanted from my husband was to see him fight to save our marriage and he said he’s fighting but I feel so alone and I Pray for my marriage, I sit and listen for God’s quite whisper in my since of confusion, and I’ll continue to Pray for my Maggie

  • Shaina

    Day 3 of this study, and I feel more alone than ever. I feel conflicted. I can’t find the hope for my marriage I need to have. When my husband says he can’t help how he feels, he loved me very much but no longer does, its hard. All outward signs point to my marriage being over. But inside I’m struggling and so is my husband. Daily he apologizes for hurting me. And says he feels terrible for it. I believe that’s conviction. But today I feel alone, I’m trying to hear God’s whisper to me. I know he’s there.

  • Sherrie Rae

    You’re not alone. Maybe make plans for something special for you both when he returns to keep your mind busy on him. Prayers for comfort.

  • Gayle Brown

    When I begin to even think that way, I begin a word of Prayer thanking God for my marriage, and for this day, I keep the Joy of the Lord in my spirit because he Is always , there even when you can’t sense Him He is carrying you. He knows all about how you feel. He will strengthen you just when you are in need. Know that Can’t Nobody do You Like Jesus. Thanks Jennifer for this Study Devotion! PG

  • Nikki Brungard

    Thank you and BLESS YOU, Camille!

  • Dani Butlin Wetherby

    Today is one of the most alone days I have ever felt. My husband will be away the entire summer, working. I have no family close by and things need to be done that i can not do. I feel totally helpless.

  • Camille

    Nikki I read your post and had to pray. You’ve done the right thing in crying out to God. He hears and will be with you and answer you. Your husband has a responsibility to hear that his wife is hurting and to do something to comfort her. If you can’t speak it then text it, email it or write it. Praying for you!

  • Mary

    His anger is in himself. Not what you are doing! Find someone trustworthy to talk to. Sometimes our Lord wants us to take a step in faith.

  • http://cymplified.com/ Cymbelly Marzan

    I feel so down these days since my hubby got mad at me. I feel he’s always angry at my mistakes. I feel unappreciated and I don’t even know what I’m doing right. I feel uneasy with him coz I don’t know if he’s going to erupt in anger again. I pray to God his heart will be touched.

  • mh

    hi ladies, if you are separated from your husbands and need support, encouragement and prayers, pls feel free to email me (yvrskygal@gmail.com) . i am a part of a small group of women who are going through or have gone through separation. as jennifer said in her post, let’s help each other out.
    12 A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.

    ecclesiastes 4:12

  • Nikki Brungard

    I feel totally ALONE right now. My husband and I live 3 hours apart and things are not good. In fact, they are downright bleak right now. I am hurting so much and cannot even begin to explain to my husband how desperate I am feeling. Please HELP, LORD, please HELP!

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